Friday, March 28, 2008

t.g.i.f.

Ready for another example of my extreme lack of a social life? My exciting activity for the evening was vacuuming the common area. And yes, that's the exciting part of my evening, to be followed by watching Food Network, studying for a test on Monday, and going to bed early. It's a scintillating life I lead.

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I've been having mood swings like crazy the past few days. For example, on Tuesday I spent a good half hour just laying on my bed. I wasn't trying to sleep, but I didn't feel like doing anything. It was weird. Then at some point on Wednesday, I was talking to Natalie about some stuff, and she was spinning it positive for me.. but I had the urge to argue the negative. Although I am innately optimistic, I tend to continuously assume the negative about my actions. We were discussing my internship from last summer, and I was explaining that I didn't receive any credit for it. Natalie countered by saying that it looks good that I got an internship without my school's help. Normally, I would've agreed wholeheartedly, with a "screw you" attitude to everyone who tried to minimize the accomplishment. But I didn't. I think I shrugged, and said "yeah, I guess."

Today I just felt down. I was angry because I had to come back for a group meeting that never happened and that I didn't get a chance to hang out with Lyndsay. There's also a third thing weighing heavily on my mind, and it's getting harder and harder for me to face it. It's just.. I initially sort of offered myself to take on this task, but now I'm regretting that decision. One part of it is my fear of confrontation. Another is the fact that the more I think about it, the harder I think it's going to be. And the sad fact is that it actually is going to be hard, and I'm not just exaggerating that fact.

Yikes.

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Well then. I'm off to curl up on my bed and watch Food Network and wish I had the food they make at my fingertips. That would be quite amazing, wouldn't it? Yes it would.

1 comment:

roomie! said...

that's ok, we made DELICIOUS NACHOS INSTEAD YAY. and guy fieri is boring. booooo.